A few weeks ago, I went camping with some people I love. I sat by the campfire, savoring the goodness of being together. I slept under the stars, marveling at the night sky. It was a feast of contentment and joy and wonder.
On the drive home, I remembered an annoying voicemail message from the day before. The more I thought about the man who left the message, the angrier and grumpier I got. I rehearsed every negative thing I knew about him. I felt justified in reviewing and cataloguing all his flaws. After all, I was simply seeing him as he really is, right?
Within an hour, all contentment and joy and wonder had evaporated. I was miserable, and I couldn’t figure out what was wrong. Was it a side-effect of the Benadryl that I took on the camping trip? I googled it. Nope, it wasn’t the Benadryl. It was simply judging.
“Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults. . . . That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging.” Matthew 7:1-2, The Message
“[W]e believe that somehow we see people as they really are only when we see them at their worst. We know that secretly Mary is slovenly, or John is a crook, or Susan is only interested in herself. When we find people’s flaws after a long acquaintance with them, we believe we are finally seeing the truth about them. Our Christian ancestors thought exactly the opposite: we see people as they really are only when we see them through the tender and compassionate eyes of God.” Roberta Bondi